A Recent Birthday

I recently had a birthday. I received happy birthday wishes from the “important” people in my life minus that of my husband (until 30 minutes before midnight).  Shocking, I know.  The day was spent trying to fix an apartment stove followed by a two and a half hour wait at the North Carolina DMV office waiting for my license to be transferred.  While I was waiting in line, my husband walked across the parking lot and a driver nearly ran him over.  The person who almost ran him over was getting a behind-the-wheel test.  Needless to say, they failed and cried to mommy.  I knew that I’d make my husband’s night when I told him this!

(Birthday “dinner” at IHOP was horrible and I’m never eating at the one on Woodlawn.)

I’ve been back in North Carolina for just under a week.  I left my husband a second time on impulse, you could say.  I had a lousy week in Florida and I realized the grass isn’t greener on the other side.  Empathy can be a curse, like my last entry said.  I’m finding it very difficult to tell Jason that I don’t want a relationship with him.  This might be impossible at this point, but I’d like to remain friends.  I can’t tell him this because I care a lot about how others feel, and I know that giving him this “news” will really upset him.  (It will also upset him if I lead him on, and I can’t decide which is worse.)  Jason thinks I’m back in Minnesota living with my parents.  He does not know that I am working things out with my husband.

Will the constant removal of Real ID, not talking on Skype, absent text messages tell him the obvious?

The stars were trying to tell me something when my unemployment didn’t go through: Amanda does not belong in Florida.

I don’t know what I want.

I have two amazing friends who tell me what I need to hear, offer support, listen, and are overall the two most honest and caring people I’ve met.  Well, I’ve met one and will probably never meet the other and I am perfectly fine with that.  I made a comment to my husband that I’d like him to meet the friend I met in Charlotte, just so my husband can feel more secure about our relationship.  I can’t introduce my husband to my other friend since my husband has a mindset that it isn’t possible to be friends with someone that you’ve never met face-to-face.  I owe one a great big hug and the other…a virtual hug I guess?

I want to be this happy again.  I’m getting there.  Slowly, but faster than I expected.

And no, I have not been in a creative mood and therefore have not done anything with the site.

This Server Downtime …

Server downtime is a pain in the butt.  What I’ve done is added two sets of name servers.  If my main site, the one you’re viewing right now, is working, everything will be working as intended.  If the server is down, you’ll be redirected to some crappy placeholder page.  Right now my placeholder is a Comcast Personal Page, but if downtime becomes a regular issue I’ll look into a different backup.  The Comcast Personal Pages are meant for “newbies.”  Enter text, name, contact email, etc.  Choose a theme and with one click, the site is live.  With the Comcast “improvements” over the past few months, basic features such as FTP uploading and custom pages are no more.  I’m forced to use a crappy template with horrible “widgets,” such as a guestbook that is 350 pixels wide.  What the…?

I was in a very, very creative mood the other day.  Those who know me know that they don’t come often.  I have put World of Warcraft on the back burner (shocking, I know!!) and I have a very special coding project that I’ve been working on and hope to release live.  What is geekier, playing World of Warcraft for a few hours or sticking my nose in code all night?

And if you’re curious, here is my to-do list.  Actually, this may be more for myself since I forget these kinds of things too!
– Create a database for Flickr
– Take a “lovely” picture of myself
– Import old entries (no comments, sadly)
– Manage sidebar placeholder “stuff”
– Friend in AZ suggested implementing Last.FM…
– Update templates; make valid XHTML/CSS
– In general make my theme “pretty” again
– Last but not least, give a true update on the past few weeks.

Ugh, this feels like a chore sometimes.